A person's awakening: 1% relies on others' reminders, 99% relies on k cuts and k knives.

Someone posted a question: What life experiences are better to know as early as possible?

In fact, a person's awakening relies 1% on others' reminders and 99% on harsh experiences; no matter how much one talks about principles, it is better to suffer a loss oneself once, as real experiences are what truly leave a lasting impression.

In life, many people tend to habitually remind others based on their own experiences:

Don't think that saving money means you should rush to grab free things; free things are the most expensive.

Don't blindly enter an industry just because it's profitable; being able to utilize your own strengths is the most important.

Don't waste your time after work; learn some new skills.

But as it is said in “A Sentence is Worth a Thousand Sentences”:

In this world, there is no sentence that can enlighten you; what truly enlightens you can only be an experience.

No matter how profound the reasoning of others is, it will never lead someone to a complete awakening.

Only through experience, losses, and suffering can one truly attain enlightenment.

1

You can never teach someone who doesn't want to learn.

A couple of days ago, a friend vented to me.

Recently, a new employee named Liu joined the company. She was assigned a few projects that are about to conclude and tasked with following up on them, reminding the owner to fill out a satisfaction survey.

During the half month working with her, my friend lost their composure several times.

When communicating with the owner, she directly agreed to help over the phone. A friend told her that she needed to confirm the matters first, but she had a look on her face as if to say “do I still need you to teach me?”

Let her make a copy of a contract, but the content of the copy is completely unclear. I taught her how to use the photocopier, and she said she doesn't understand electronic products very well.

I sent her a form to help print, but it came out with misaligned lines. I taught her how to correct it, and then we printed it again. As a result, she displayed a “what a hassle” expression.

Clearly, the other party not only did not appreciate it but also felt that she was meddling, rendering her kind reminder completely futile.

Many times, you cannot wake up someone who is pretending to be asleep, nor can you teach someone who does not want to learn.

Better to remain silent than to waste words.

Those who truly want to learn will take the initiative to ask you.

A person's awakening: 1% relies on reminders from others, 99% relies on being torn apart by a thousand knives.

Fanbook · Plus

Drucker Bo Ya Management

October 23, 2025 16:59

28 people

Author: Fan Shu · Plus Sign

Source: Fanbook (ID: readingclub_btfx)

Someone posted online asking: What are some life experiences that are better to know as early as possible?

A netizen replied:

A person's awakening relies 1% on reminders from others and 99% on personal suffering; no amount of reasoning is as effective as experiencing loss oneself; only through real-life experiences can one truly remember.

In life, many people tend to habitually remind others based on their own experiences:

Don't think that saving money means you should grab free things; the free things are the most expensive.

Don't blindly enter an industry just because it's profitable; being able to utilize your own strengths is the most important.

Don't waste your time after work; learn some new skills.

But as it is said in “A Sentence is Worth a Thousand Sentences”:

In this world, there is no sentence that can enlighten you; what truly enlightens you can only be an experience.

No matter how profound others' reasoning may be, it will not lead someone to complete enlightenment.

Only by experiencing, suffering losses, and being hurt can one truly gain enlightenment.

1

You can never teach someone who doesn't want to learn.

A couple of days ago, a friend vented to me.

Recently, a new employee named Xiao Liu joined the company. She was assigned a few projects that are about to end and arranged for her to follow up, just reminding the owners to fill out a satisfaction questionnaire.

During the half month spent working with her, my friend has had several breakdowns.

When communicating with the owner, she directly agreed to help over the phone. A friend told her that she needed to confirm the details first, but she had a face that said “I still need you to teach me.”

Let her make a copy of the contract, but the content of the copy is completely unreadable. I taught her how to use the copier, and she said she doesn't understand electronic products very well.

I sent her a form to help print, but there were mistakes in the printing. I taught her how to fix it, and then we printed it again. As a result, she showed a look of “so troublesome.”

Obviously, the other party not only did not appreciate it, but also thought she was meddling, and a kind reminder went completely to waste.

Many times, you cannot wake up a person who is pretending to be asleep, nor can you teach someone who does not want to learn.

Better to remain silent than to waste breath.

Those who truly want to learn will take the initiative to ask you.

We have all learned the idiom “not ashamed to ask”. It was during Confucius's first participation in the ancestral worship ceremony of the Lu state.

He inquired about the ceremony-related matters from others everywhere, almost asking about every detail.

Then someone mocked him, saying: Who says Confucius understands etiquette? When he comes to the Grand Ancestral Temple, doesn’t he still have to ask others about everything?

Confucius replied: The things you do not understand yourself are precisely what you should humbly seek to learn from others.

You see, those who truly want to learn do not need reminders from others and will never miss any opportunity to ask others for advice.

But those who do not want to learn, even if they don't understand anything, will not ask others a single question.

Zeng Guofan once said: There are people who cannot be persuaded, and it is unnecessary to waste breath on them.

It's important to know that even a well-educated person cannot easily persuade or change someone.

No amount of advice or reasoning is worth depleting one's mental energy.

The only thing we can do is not disturb each other, not impose and consume one another.

Even the closest people around you, such as family, lovers, and friends, should not interfere too much.

Allow them to be themselves, to experience, to feel, and to live well.

2

People cannot be awakened.

Can only wake up in pain

The Russian novelist Krylov once told a short story.

There was a unique fox that always liked to walk with its tail held high, thinking it looked better that way.

But many companions advised it to lower its tail to sweep away the footprints behind it, so as not to be targeted by hunters.

But the fox disagreed, thinking that it was more clever than others and would not be discovered.

One day, it was strutting along as usual when it was discovered by a hunter who followed closely behind and raised his gun to shoot.

It was so scared that it ran for its life, eventually injuring its leg.

After this, it obediently lowered its tail without needing any persuasion and occasionally checked behind to see if there were any footprints.

In fact, this fox is just like each of us; no matter how useful the reasoning is, it is of no help if others tell it to you.

Only after experiencing pain, suffering setbacks, and being battered and bruised, will one awaken to reality.

As the saying goes:

What can persuade a person is never reason, but rather the south wall;

What can awaken a person is never preaching, but rather hardship.

In 2008, Ji Jian, who was repeating a year, stubbornly chose to submit a blank paper during the college entrance examination.

After the exam, I ran to Kunming to work.

He has worked as a construction worker, done assembly work, and even helped people write articles. During this time, he has moved between four or five cities, and at his lowest point, he even slept on the streets.

It was this experience that truly awakened him, prompting him to work hard, read books, attend lectures, and constantly think and learn.

Later, he wrote in his book that over the years in society, he had done all kinds of dirty and exhausting work, living without any dignity, even worse than a dog.

As for the action of wanting to score zero in the college entrance examination, he said: that was a pit I dug when I was young, and now I have been working hard to fill it up.

The writer Chen Zhongshi wrote in his book “The Blue Robe Gentleman”:

Many truths in life can only be realized through personal experience; things that have not been experienced feel like they are covered by a layer of paper, no matter how much others may say.

Some people become less attentive the more you remind them.

When he really faces difficulties, he will change quickly on his own without you having to teach him.

When I was young, I didn't pay attention to eating on time, and I didn't take any reminders seriously. Later, after suffering from stomach problems, I learned to take care of my health.

When you just go through the motions at work and don't take your leader's education seriously, you only understand the need to work hard after being laid off.

When in love, one can be too infatuated, unwilling to wake up no matter how others around advise. It is only after being dumped that one realizes that even in love, one cannot lose oneself.

Clearly, human beings have their own causes and effects, and no one can interfere.

No matter what the other party is going through, all we can do is observe quietly, rather than excessively remind.

The detours that life must take cannot be skipped, not even a single step.

Only after he has personally experienced pain will he know what to do in the future.

The choices he makes now and the seeds he plants will be the results he reaps in the future, and this is the best growth for him.

3

Instead of pointing others in a direction

Better to focus on your own path.

I once saw Mo Yan talk about the origin of his pen name.

He said that when he was a child herding cattle, he couldn't help but chime in no matter what he encountered, which ended up getting him into a lot of trouble.

When he returned home, his mother scolded him, while his father told him: Son, speak less and focus on yourself.

So, he chose the pen name “Mo Yan” for himself and advised himself to focus on himself and to point out less to others.

After becoming famous, many readers requested him to write an article to share his methods of reading and writing.

He only made this kind of response:

First, reading is just like dressing and eating, each has its own methods, and my method may influence your reading.

Secondly, my daughter is currently in middle school, and I never guide her with her homework because times have changed, and my old methods may not necessarily be suitable for her.

In Mo Yan's view, regardless of one's position or role, one should not easily point fingers at others.

Everyone has their own aspirations, and everyone has their own path.

You can't change other people's paths; walk your own path well.

Educating oneself and managing oneself is the primary prerequisite for achieving anything.

Many people have seen the movie “Forrest Gump”, where the most ordinary Forrest eventually becomes a sports champion and a millionaire.

Why did Forrest Gump ultimately succeed?

The reason is simple: because he never pays attention to others, only to himself.

Focus on doing anything and stick to it until the end.

When playing rugby, he runs with the ball until he reaches the destination; when playing table tennis, his eyes are firmly fixed on the ball and he doesn't look away, then he hits it back.

Redirect your precious energy away from others and focus entirely on yourself and your own growth.

In intimate relationships, it's okay to let your partner slack off occasionally, as long as you stay focused.

In the workplace, it's acceptable for colleagues to take shortcuts as long as you are grounded and do your job well.

In friendships, it is acceptable to allow the other person to have negative emotions, as long as you remain optimistic and positive.

I strongly agree with this saying:

A true strong person is the harshest on themselves, sets the strictest demands on themselves, and does not impose demands on others.

We cannot replace others' growth with our own ideas.

Moreover, do not naively think that you can use your own experience to correct others' problems.

The only thing we can do is to not point others to the maze, but to focus on our own growth.

It's enough to submit a satisfactory answer to this exam of life.

4

Written at the end

The writer Liao Yimei once said:

Humans are quite peculiar animals; they cannot learn from joy, only grow through pain. Pain can become your nourishment, and the more pain you endure, the larger that tree will grow.

Pain is the catalyst for the maturation of wisdom in life, and it is also an opportunity for transformation and enlightenment.

This is a necessary topic for others; as bystanders, we should just focus on ourselves and not intervene or meddle.

In the rest of my life, I will not educate, interfere, or point out to others, but focus on my own path and not control others' lives.

**$HIGH **